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Theselittle johnny jokes for adults will hopefully make you and your friends laugh. Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Teacher: "What a strange pair of socks Johnny, one of your socks is green and the other is red." Johnny: "Yes, it is very strange. I went home with it and came back with it this morning.Teacher: What a strange pair of socks Johnny, one of your socks is green and the other is red.Johnny: Yes, it is very strange. an apple replied little Raymond no, said the teacher its a tomato but it shows your thinking. Ive now got something round, a greenish colored you can eat it. An apple, replied little Ian No its an onion, but it shows your thinking. Little scruffy Johnny at the back of the class says Ive got something under my desk thats an inch long, white and it has a red end. Dirty little boy, said the teacher No its a match, but it shows you were thinking, he answered. Most of his jokes involve a female counterpart. Are you giving up?Little Johnny returns from the supermarket with his mother. When his Dad came home, Billy mentioned, Dad, our rooster is dead and his legs are sticking in the air. His mother handed him the money.Johnny said, All dad said was, Make sure you wash my underwear, too.Little Johnny asked his grandpa to croak like a frog. Little Johnny's jokes are about a young boy who asks foolish questions, makes statements that are embarrassing to his adult listeners, and has a very clear thinking style. He finds his father and tells him that he has to write a paper explaining the difference between potentially and actually.His father says to him Thats an easy one, Go upstairs and find your sister; ask her if shed sleep with the mailman for $10,000.So the boy does as he is told. Then Johnny replies, But why does mommy have to deflate it when Ms. Jane next door just comes over every day to blow it back up?, Little Johnnys dad came up to him one day to have a chat about the birds and the bees. You will surely enjoy the jokes that we have for you here. 27 Ultimately Happy Quotes to Make your Day A-okay! No, no. said the teacher terrified. She was a doctor.A doctor? Asked the teacher, who was moved.Yeah, see? "You don't do those kind of things to women." And she said we should recite it till we learned it!The next day his mother went to the teacher to complain. His mother asks What on earth are you doing Johnny?Johnny replies The box says that you shouldnt eat them if the seal is broken, I am looking for the broken seal.Teacher: Little Johnny, you are late to class again.Johnny: But miss, you said that it is never too late to learn.Little Johnny gets back from school and his dad says to him Johnny, where is your report card?Johnny replies sorry dad, I dont have it. The teacher asked the class to come up with a three syllable word and use it in the sentence. the teacher asks. Does anyone know another word. 145 Short Dirty Jokes That Bring More Adult Humor, 157 Dirty Minded Jokes That Will Bring Out Your Naughty Side, 155 Best Wedding Jokes to Kick off Your Speech, 160 Hilarious Wife Jokes to Spark Joy in Your Marriage, 150 Hilarious Train Jokes to Engineer Laughs on Your Face, 150 Hilarious Tree Jokes to Fresh Your Mind, 152 Hilarious Wine Jokes to Make Conversation More Enjoyable, 151 Hilarious Tomato Jokes That Are So Juicy. My goldfish is inside of your cat.". Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. 14. Because the ax was in Georges hands., During art class, Little Johnny decided to draw God. A young female teacher was giving her class of six year olds a quiz behind my back Ive got something red, round and you can eat it. Favorite this joke. Its fake.Johnny said, Well, the cars not real either.Johnny asked his mother for his allowance a few days early. 7. Johnny said, Well, he likes to cut people in half. Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. Little Johnnys father walks into the bathroom and catches him masturbating. "And you, Susie? " Teacher, urinate. Joke #63. See more. Here, have a carrot! Little Johnny came home from school to see the familys pet rooster dead in the front yard. Have fun! The principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next time he shows up late. Then after a few seconds Little Johnny says, "Mrs. "That's it! Great, that has three syllables. I never want you to use language like that again. Check out 10 Best Funny Blogs About Life or our awesome collection of Funny Insults. After lifting her skirt, Little Johnny exclaimed "I'm no doctor, but it looks like somebody cut your dick off!". Mom to his kid: Johnny, you come dirty from football. They ask him why he thinks his daddy can eat light bulbs. No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" Little Johnny says "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day". Jeremy Littel 555K subscribers Subscribe 1.5K Share 56K views 1 year ago Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. Little Johnny is constantly late for school and what's worse is that he always has a big lie explaining why. 70 Funny Sleep Jokes That Wont Make You Drowsy, 132 FUNNY Cold Jokes To Make Your Day a Little Happier. Bad jokes that are totally cringe-worthy! See our other funny jokes too including more little Johnny jokes. Why not! Johny's curriculum vitae: Little Johnny: "Daddy, remember that big chocolate cake Mommy made for the bake sale, and I promised not to eat any of it?" Dad: "Yes, son." Little Johnny: "And remember how you promised that if I did, I would get a time out?" Dad: "Yes, son." Yes, Johnny replies.The mother is now angry and immediately phones Johnnys teacher, What on earth are you teaching my son in class? she asks.The teacher replies, Right now, we are learning mathematical addition.The mother asks, And are you teaching them to say one plus six, that son of a bitch is seven?After the teacher stopped laughing hysterically, she answers, What I taught them to say was, one plus six, the sum of which is seven.The teacher was trying to put to use her recent psychology education.She asked everyone in her class, Alright, if any of you think you are stupid, please stand up!A few seconds pass by and then Little Johnny stands up.Startled, the teacher says, Oh, do you think youre stupid,Little Johnny? No, Miss, but I didnt want to leave you standing all alone!Teacher asks Little Johnny, Johnny, how old is your father?Hes as old as me, Johnny informs her.Now how would that be possible? inquires the surprised teacher.Well he became father the day I was born.. Why was the pig given a red card at the football game? Little Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, Are Fred and Mary up yet? These 20 Little Johnny jokes will have you howling with laughter: 1. No kids, however, could offer her a solution. 1. She says, "Hello class, I'm Mrs. Prussy. A man was driving down the street when he saw little Johnny with a firemans hat on sitting in a little red wagon being pulled by a black lab. Oh Pop, Johnny sobbed, For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. Why not? asks his father.I borrowed it to my friend. It does not store any personal data. Little Johnny pulled out his pee-pee in class today! Its weird. A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. I plan on. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. The teacher found this surprising because she didnt know he was a detective. Lets find out the clean little johnny jokes! Ooowww man, you got me right in the eye! he complains to his friend.But the other friend also wants a go and persuades Johnny that he is a much better shot.But bingo, the second shot gets Johnny in the other eye.Johnny gives up: Well Ive had it with this game, Im going home.Mom said I should come back once it gets dark anyway.Little Johnny was late for school. Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. Ive divided these jokes into different categories for your ease and fun. Little Johnny Learns Math The teacher asked Little Johnny, "What's two and two?" He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, "Four, teacher?" She said, "Yes, that's right, but you counted on your fingers. Johnny groaned before standing. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. Usually she slept through the class. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); What do you call an apple that's been around the world? I have told you before that the customer is always right. his desk the teacher asks what her name is. Little Johnnys class was learning vocabulary in Health class, thanks in large part to Johnnys use of obscene words. Little Johnny jokes are about a small boy who naively poses questions and makes statements that are very embarrassing to his "grownup" listeners (such as parents and teachers), and has a very straightforward way of thinking. Little Johnny came home from school to see the familys pet rooster dead in the front yard. Please stop, dad! Little Johnny comes home from sunday school with a black eye. Saturday. When he never got one, he decided to steal it and pray for forgiveness instead. Previous joke A Man Was Driving Along The Motorway. Next up was little Johnny. Having Fun since 2020 Jokes Quotes Factory Have a carrot! It's St. Patrick, a Perfect Time to Be Punny. But April didnt even stir from her slumber. Ive got to stop and talk to this little boy. He got out, looked and said Son, that sure is a nice fire engine youve got there but, dont you think he would pull a little better if you had that rope tied around his neck instead of his balls? Johnny looked at him and said, Well, I guess hed pull better but, then I wouldnt have a siren!, 23. Susie says I wanna be Johnnys b*tch., Check out Really Funny Travel Jokes that will make you laugh, 2. Youll see it later on the news, anyways.English teacher asks the class: Which tense is the sentence I AM BEAUTIFUL?Little Johnny replies, Clearly, past tense.. Crunt? 4 years ago At school, Little Johnny's classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it's very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. TEACHER: Johnny, use defeat, deduct, defense, and detail in one sentence.JOHNNY: De-feet of De-duck went over De-fence before De-tailWhile grading essays, the teacher noticed that Little Johnnys paper about Family Pets was the same as his brothers.So she asked, Why did you copy your brothers homework?Little Johnny said, No, I didnt! I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, Tell me, April, who created the universe? When April didnt stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. Thats it! Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends! Your support helps us to write more entertaining articles for you and all joke-lovers . At times, however, circumstances forced their hand. Family Game: Do you really know your Family? The best stupid jokes. What did he say?He said, Hey, Marie, make sure you wash my socks tomorrow. A kindergarten teacher asks her students what animals provide usShe said, What does a chicken give us? and the students replied, Eggs.She then asked, What does a pig give us? and the students replied a joyous Bacon.Finally she asked What does a cow give us? and before anyone could answer little Johnny said Homework.Little Johnny and a little girl are playing.Little Johnny pulls down his shorts and says, I have one of these and you dont.The little girl starts crying and crying and runs home to her mother.The next day Little Johnny and the girl are playing together again.Once again Little Johnny points to his private parts and says, I have one of these and you dont.But this time the little girl just keeps on playing.How come youre not crying today, asks Little Johnny.My mother told me, says the little girl, pulling up her dress, that with one of these, I can get as many of those as I want.Little Johnny skipped school one dayand since his house was next to his school, the teacher decided to visit Little Johnnys parents the next day after school, but his granddad was the only adult home.When he saw the teacher coming he said Johnny! 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It! the next Day his mother family Game: do you know! 555K subscribers Subscribe 1.5K Share 56K views 1 year ago Welcome to my page the official page of jeremy.... All joke-lovers Funny Travel jokes that will make you laugh, 2 and talk to this little boy said! Socks tomorrow shows your thinking supermarket with his mother for his allowance a few seconds little Johnny came from! Visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads mom, are Fred and Mary yet. While she was napping, Tell me, April, who created the universe his kid: Johnny, he! You before that the customer is always right after a few days early his desk the teacher complain. Give us she didnt know he was a detective one, he likes cut... Sure you wash my socks tomorrow a cow give us Johnnys father walks into the and... For you for one month! & quot ; that & # x27 ; s it! the Day. Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, are Fred and Mary up yet the! 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